I feel like this book should really be called Passive Aggressive Mallory. Mallory basically has a breakdown, all because she failed to communicate her needs to anyone in her life and was shocked that none of them were mind-readers. To back up, Mallory is in a special creative writing class at school (which we’ve never heard of before, and I assume will not come up ever again). There’s apparently a school-wide competition, which only applies to sixth graders, for creative writing. Mallory decides to enter the Best Overall Fiction category, which requires going into hermit-mode to work on a story.
Of course, the Pikes procreate like it’s their job, and then neglect said offspring like they have other jobs, so Mallory is the live-in Cinderella. In one afternoon, she stops the triplets from scaring Claire, stops Margo from playing in their mom’s makeup, saves Nicky from a hamster bite, catches said hamster, and stops an argument between the triplets. All of this is to say that the girl has no time to do her homework, because indentured servitude + the underage labor of the BSC is a full time gig.
So Mal is stressed over her story, and goes to a BSC meeting where she’s offered a job that she turns down. Rather than saying that it’s because she has homework, which any reasonable person would understand, she says nothing at all, because she puts the passive in passive aggressive like it’s another full time job.
Back in Pike-land, Mallory wakes up early to finish her homework, and then tries to work on her story. Instead, after she pays Vanessa a whole quarter to stay out of their shared room, her mom has her baby-sit four siblings, make Claire a PBJ to feed her dolls, fold clothes, and set the table for dinner. Another day, she has to convince Claire that it’s ok that all of the dinosaurs are extinct, and make dessert for dinner. Because God forbid Mrs. Pike run her own household. She starts to be nervous that she won’t be able to finish her story in time, which is a huge deal since her creative writing teacher is apparently responsible for all of her self-worth. Finally, Mal has writing time, but gets so caught up in her craft that she is late to a BSC meeting. She still feels no need to explain things to anyone, so instead just sits there, rejects sitting jobs, and cries when confronted. All of this escalates to the point where she asks to be demoted from the BSC, rather than just do her homework and get over herself.
The spiral of insanity continues to the point where it involves props. She designs and creates a sandwich board that says “Mallory on Strike” and wears it downstairs for breakfast, because her family is so overbearing that she loses the power of speech. Except this is her first time even attempting to communicate, and it’s crazy. As soon as she expresses herself, her parents immediately have everyone leave her alone, and even hire baby-sitters when they need to run out. So maybe the Pikes were reasonable all along? And Mallory is just a writer who can’t use her words?
The book starts winding to a close with several insane events. First, Mallory gets a special day all to herself, courtesy of her parents. They take her and Jessi to the mall for the day, which is apparently the most personal attention she’s ever gotten. Then, because Mallory can’t just take it, she plans a special day for the rest of the Pikes, which includes paper hat making, a circus put on by neighborhood kids, puppet making, a scavenger hunt, burgers, and ice cream. And of course, because she’s a BSC member, Mallory wins the writing contest. So I guess the lesson for this story is that hissy fits work?
Awards:
Most Random Stoneybrook Term: Apparently people ‘often’ call the Pike kids stair-step kids because they’re born one after another. First, is this a term people use? And second, aren’t all kids born after each other, so wouldn’t this apply to literally all multi-sibling families?
Most Awkward Thing We Learned: Kristy doesn’t need a bra yet.
Best Insult: Dawn refers to Stacey as Old Tightwad. I support this.
Baby-Sitters Club Notebook 